Monday, March 26, 2012
Lonely night like this keeps me thinking about us, human. I think i am a very philosophical person in one way or another. I am currently pondering if one is able to really disregard the discomfort or discontentment towards the people around them, i mean...even their closest ones?
I don't have a solid post about that yet but personally...i think i do show my displeasure if the slightest thing irks me even by my closest ones. Not a huge one, but certainly i make sure its obvious enough to catch their attentions. Then i never have the courage to spit what is the fuss i am picking on. Why am i so ironic?
I just want them to know i am not happy? There is really something about him/her/them which got me frustrated but then i dare not reveal because i guess i am not ready to be judged. Like being judged for being impatient in waiting (when they could wait for me) or for being critical...Maybe, i just simply didn't want to hurt their feelings.
Many thoughts running through my mind but i know i couldn't pen it down here. I read dearest's blog and i do agree with her that it is pointless to write a post without anyone to agree or disagree with. But then if i were to pen it down here, i know my words will hurt other people and simply, be judged. Its a tug-of-war game between wanting to let my thoughts known yet the need to protect my words. I feel so sad that this space can never truly be mine.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Lonely night like this keeps me thinking about us, human. I think i am a very philosophical person in one way or another. I am currently pondering if one is able to really disregard the discomfort or discontentment towards the people around them, i mean...even their closest ones?
I don't have a solid post about that yet but personally...i think i do show my displeasure if the slightest thing irks me even by my closest ones. Not a huge one, but certainly i make sure its obvious enough to catch their attentions. Then i never have the courage to spit what is the fuss i am picking on. Why am i so ironic?
I just want them to know i am not happy? There is really something about him/her/them which got me frustrated but then i dare not reveal because i guess i am not ready to be judged. Like being judged for being impatient in waiting (when they could wait for me) or for being critical...Maybe, i just simply didn't want to hurt their feelings.
Many thoughts running through my mind but i know i couldn't pen it down here. I read dearest's blog and i do agree with her that it is pointless to write a post without anyone to agree or disagree with. But then if i were to pen it down here, i know my words will hurt other people and simply, be judged. Its a tug-of-war game between wanting to let my thoughts known yet the need to protect my words. I feel so sad that this space can never truly be mine.